Local Swingers Misinterpret “Game Night” Invite

By Scott Salad

Published March 9th, 2015

AMSTERDAM — A local “Game Night” went horribly wrong Saturday when a couple with an open marriage —acting on the assumption group sex would be involved — began undressing during the final round of a spirited game of Apples to Apples.

Rhonda and Daniel Cornfoot of Amsterdam — who admit to being active Capital Region swingers — were invited to the Overlook Avenue home of Blaine and Margot Tuffner for what the Tuffners maintain was “an innocent night of good food, fun board games and moderate drinking.”

“We just wanted a few benign hours away from the kids,” said Blaine Tuffner. “A few laughs with friends and a few drinks. Nothing remotely carnal.”

He insists he and his wife had no idea the Cornfoots — whose children attend the same Montessori school as the Tuffner’s twin girls— were swingers, claiming the couple seemed like “nice people with similar ideals and a good sense of humor.”

“Up until that evening,” Tuffner said, “we never once felt uncomfortable in their presence.”

But all that changed the moment hors d'oeuvres were served.

“Dan kept on complimenting my wife on her stuffed mushroom. It wasn't even that good. Kinda dry. But he just kept going on and on. 'Your stuffed mushroom looks delicious. I can't wait to try your stuffed mushroom. I have a feeling your stuffed mushroom will be the best I've ever had. I want your stuffed mushroom.' He kept it up for a while, even after he actually had some of it. Weird, right?”

The Cornfoots admit they misconstrued the invite, claiming in their world “game night” is code for a get together ending in an Eyes Wide Shut-like orgy.

“Game night is swinger code for a gang bang in the company of consenting adults,” said Daniel Cornfoot. “It's not an actual game night with actual board games. Who does that?”

“Plenty of civilized, non-creepy people host actual game nights,” countered Blaine Tuffner. “Only a pack of wild dogs would think otherwise.

“We're normal, married people, who understand the key to a fulfilling relationship begins and ends with monogamy,” he added. “You know, consensual abstinence.”

To make matters right, the Cornfoots agreed to buy the Tuffners a brand new Taboo timer, since Rhonda Cornfoot was observed violating the original one in the moments before her and her husband were politely asked to gather up their clothing and vacate the premises.


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