Cohoes to Host Real-Life ‘Hunger Games’

By Fred Furnace

Published June 14th, 2015

"Bobbing for Apples"—one of the many challenges proposed
by organizers of this year's Hunger Games in Cohoes.

COHOES – To address what has become an increasingly dire situation, the city of Cohoes announced this week it will hold a Hunger Games-style competition to determine who will eat and who will die.

The games – which sources say will be modeled after the popular book and film series in which children hunt and kill each other for the chance to win food – will take place this fall.

According to Cohoes Mayor Chuck McDoop, the drastic measure is necessary to ensure order in his once-proud city.

"We needed to take a realistic look at our situation," said McDoop. "We simply don't have the resources to feed everyone who needs to eat. So, naturally, we concluded that a fight-to-the-death among our town’s children was really the only solution available to us at this time."

While some are outraged by the decision, McDoop offered a positive spin.

"Yes, children will die. And yes, families will starve as a result. But some will be fed. And maybe – just maybe – we will even see our own version of Katniss Everdeen emerge. A brave Cohoes girl who will kick ass, feed her clan, and, eventually, blossom into a really smokin’ hot adult."

The ACLU, UNICEF, the United Way, Food Network, and Toys for Tots have all come out in opposition to the plan. Gov. Andrew Cuomo, however, says he supports the measure and plans to “tune-in to see how it all shakes out.”

WRGB has won local television rights, sources say.

Highlights of the competition will air over a three-week span this October, in-between weather and sports.


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