State Raises Confederate Flag, Just To Symbolically Take It Down

By Fred Furnace

Published July 12th, 2015

ALBANY — In a show of solidarity with those opposing the public display of the Confederate flag, Gov. Andrew Cuomo had the Southern Cross raised high above the Capitol on Friday so that he could angrily demand its removal.

The flag, which many equate to a symbol of racism, has come under increased fire recently, especially in the aftermath of a senseless hate crime in Columbia, S.C. In light of this growing national outrage, Cuomo decided he, too, needed to take an emphatic public stand.

Just one problem: New York was in the Union not the Confederacy, and the Confederate flag has never flown above the New York statehouse.  Thus, when the governor went outside to angrily order the flag’s removal, it simply wasn’t there.

"He wasn't going to let a minor detail like that stop him," said a Cuomo aide. “This was too important to him. He was hell-bent on removing that flag, even if he had to put it up himself.”

Instead, Cuomo ordered a groundskeeper to "find a damn Confederate flag and hang it up that pole, so I can order you to take it down!"

Locating a Confederate flag on short notice proved to be a bit of a challenge, as most Albany-area retailers simply do not carry it. After several hours of searching, however, the groundskeeper reportedly found one inside the gift shop of a local Cracker Barrel restaurant.

Once the flag was raised, Cuomo wasted no time ordering the groundskeeper to “remove that damn flag, once and for all!”

"That flag will never again fly above this Capitol," Cuomo declared to a throng of confused reporters invited to witness the historic event. “Our Confederate past is behind us. Today, we move forward.”


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