Yankee Girl’ Annoying Co-Workers
By Quack Davis
Published August 2nd, 2015
ALBANY — Die-hard Yankees fan Gina Sherbet is pissing off her fellow state workers — and not just the ones who root for the Boston Red Sox.
The super tan and short, squat Latham woman with platinum hair boasts 17 Yankees posters in her cubicle in the Empire State Plaza, including a king-sized photo of a half-naked Derek Jeter lying on a beach that reads: "RE2PECT This Baby!"
The Smudge paid a visit to the cubicle at the state Office of General Services on a request from Sherbet's distressed co-workers.
“Got rings?” Sherbet said sarcastically while refusing to be interviewed by a Smudge reporter wearing a Red Sox cap. “We got 27. Buh-bye!”
Ernie Brattwalker, 45, of Delmar, who sits in the cubicle behind Sherbet, said he’s considering quitting his job.
“I used to love the Yankees,” he said. “But Gina destroyed them for me. I wish I could retire. Now. ”
A Smudge investigation revealed that Sherbet — who typically dons a hot pink Yankee cap and whose face is often covered by heavy pancake make up — used the moniker “JETER Girl” on Match.com before she met her current paramour, 394-pound Louie “C-Note” Fitzcaraldo, who works as an assistant car mechanic for his father, Norm, in Rotterdam.
“She’s NOT Jeter’s girl!” said sickened co-worker Debbie Skulls of Troy. “Everybody knows she’s dating that fat loser Louie who lives in his parents’ basement. She’s disgusting.”
Aiden McShaunigans of Colonie, a Red Sox fan who grew up in Boston, said he’s not fond of Sherbet either, adding she once wore a shirt to work that said “Fawk Bahston.”
“I’ll admit, I slept with Gina a couple times last summer,” he said. “Things didn’t work out though. She kept calling me ‘Derek.’”