For Preet's Sake, No! Feds To Indict Every Last NYS Pol
Published January 24th, 2016
ALBANY – In a dagger to the heart of New York state government, a sweeping indictment will be announced this week by Manhattan U.S. Attorney Preet Bharara that names all 213 members of the state Legislature.
The eye-popping indictment will reportedly charge each and every lawmaker with second-degree impersonation of a public servant, first-degree pandering and criminal possession of an intern.
All extramarital girlfriends and boyfriends of legislators also will be charged as accessories, added Bharara, who is fresh off his successful prosecutions of legislative leaders Sheldon Silver and Dean Skelos.
“As today’s charges make clear, Albany’s culture of disgust has been perpetuated and promoted at every level of the political food chain: the top of the food chain, the middle of the food chain and the bottom of the food chain — and in other parts of the food chain and in some parts of the chain where there is not even a crumb,” Bharara said.
“And as these kick-ass charges also show, the greedy art of secret self-reward was practiced with particular cleverness and cynicism by everyone. So, put that in your pipe and smoke it, Albany!”
Bharara said it would be inappropriate to name the cooperating witnesses in the case — one of whom used to be the Democratic speaker of the Assembly from Manhattan’s lower east side and the other being the former Republican Senate majority leader from Nassau County.
Bharara said he chose not to charge any of the politicians with honest services fraud because “that law really confuses the hell out of me and it is very boring and nobody really wants to read about it.“
Bharara, who wore a muscle shirt to the news conference, also told the press: “Stay tuned!”
Bob Stoops, a spokesman for Bharara, said the prosecutor was “just kidding. We’ve arrested everybody.”