Cuomo’s Transgender Plan: All Bathrooms To Be Unisex

By Fred Furnace

Published May 1st, 2016

ALBANY – Gov. Andrew Cuomo announced Saturday a major overhaul to the state’s bathroom gender policies.

“Every restroom in the state — whether public or private — will henceforth be open to both men and women equally, regardless of whether they are transgender or cisgender,” Cuomo said. “And all restrooms will now be required to feature both urinals and stalls.”

Cuomo made the announcement as the debate over transgender bathroom access rages across much of the nation.

“This issue is the new litmus test for whether you are hip, or whether you are an asshole,” Cuomo said. “I didn’t want to take any chances on this one. We are going all-in on being hip.”

The nation’s preeminent thought leaders — ESPN, Disney, and George Clooney — all immediately hailed the announcement. The NFL tweeted that it would consider Syracuse and Utica as potential host cities for a future Super Bowl in light of the governor’s order.

Opponents, meanwhile, called the plan “insane,” adding it would cost more than $1 billion to implement — a “disproportionate amount of money,” since fewer than 100 transgender people are believed to reside in the state.

   “This is making a very expensive mountain out of a tiny little molehill,” said Assemblyman Evan Crutch, a Republican from the North Country. “We have huge problems in this state and the governor wants to spend a billion dollars because a handful of weirdos don’t know what gender they are? This is madness.”

“And what the hell does ‘cisgender’ mean, anyway,” Crutch asked. “Does that just mean normal people?”

Cuomo quickly denounced the attacks, saying “this issue is about principle, not numbers.”

“I don’t care how many people will, or will not, benefit from this move,” he said. “That’s really not the point. The point is: New York is a hip state, with a hip governor. End of discussion.”


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