Milk and Bread to Join Egg in Albany Skyline

By Fred Furnace

Published November 27th, 2016

Photo illegally swiped from some guy posing as Matt Wade

ALBANY — The eccentric Albany skyline is about to get a little weirder, as buildings in the shape of milk and bread will be constructed nearby the Egg in a celebration of the state’s agricultural heritage.

“Bread, milk, and eggs are key ingredients in kitchens throughout New York state, yet for years, the Albany skyline has only featured an Egg,” Cuomo said at a press conference announcing the plan. “Well, that oversight ends today. Finally, Albany will have a skyline that not only looks great, but tastes great, too.”

State Agricultural Department Commissioner Richard Ball applauded the plan, calling it “a confirmation of the importance of random agricultural items.”

“This is terrific news,” Ball said. “I’d love to see some slabs of bacon or maybe a few apples adorn the skyline at some point in the future. But milk and bread are a great start!”

The Egg was constructed in the 1970s at a cost of about $100 million. The price of Cuomo’s plan to add milk and bread to the Empire State Plaza should easily top $4 billion.

“Sure, it’s a big expense, but what’s right is right,” Cuomo said.

Numerous members of the state Legislature, however, oppose the move, calling it “reckless,” “unnecessary,” and “totally confounding.”

Some even question whether breakfast is the proper motif for the Plaza.

“If anything, it looks more like a football sitting on a tee,” said state Senate Majority Leader John Flanagan. “Forget milk and bread. A 50-story goalpost would make a hell of a lot more sense if you ask me.”


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