Cold Snap Dashes Region’s Hope for Global Warming

By Cecily Bapp

Published March 12th, 2017

ALBANY — This week across the Capital District Mother Nature reminded residents who’s boss.

A cold snap plunged temperatures to the single digits, disappointing many who were beginning to feel that global warming had at last reached the edge of the North Country.

“Goddamn it. Global warming is powerful and inevitable. And it will make it here, eventually,” said Dr. Pamela Van Dam of UAlbany’s Department of Atmospheric and Environmental Sciences, who was adamant when reached by the Smudge. “Don’t give up hope.”

Though dreaded as the beginning of the demise of the planet by most people of the world, the notion of global warming is looked upon favorably like Santa Claus at Christmastime here in the Capital Region, where winters are long, brutal, dark and cold.

Melissa Sweatrout, a professional dog groomer and area mom of five children, is one of those who had hoped global warming had finally loosened winter’s icy grip.

“Almost all the snow had melted, and it was at least 40 degrees for three days in a row. I started to think that it was real — you know, global warming,” said Sweatrout, as she struggled to maintain her composure. “I’m not afraid to say it. It’s what we’ve all been praying for.”

As she wiped away the tears that spilled down her cheeks, Sweatrout then raised her chin defiantly.

“I’m putting it right out there: I am sick and tired of winter, and welcome global warming with open arms. If that makes me a monster, so be it.”


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