Waterford Man's Psychotic Break Related To Mama June's Weight Loss
Published March 19th, 2017
WATERFORD — A village man is recovering at Seven Zephyrs Rehabilitation Center in Saratoga after suffering a nervous breakdown brought on by what his doctor is calling “an acute fixation” with reality star Mama June's dramatic slim down.
Drew Goutfoot, 52, was rushed to Samaritan Hospital last week after a friend discovered him foaming at the mouth and talking gibberish inside his Fourth Street apartment.
The general contractor and two-time local dart league champion was treated for severe dehydration and malnourishment before being moved to Seven Zephyrs. Once there, mental health professionals — looking for any clue as to what caused the man's sudden emotional collapse — discovered thousands of June “Mama June” Shannon-related links in his browser's history.
“Mr. Goutfoot's mental capacity became compromised during the 12 sleepless days and nights he spent Googling 'Mama June's waistline,'” said Dr. Hellmans Milquetoast, a psychiatrist at Seven Zephyrs. “He read a staggering number of articles on the topic before he cracked. I think it was too much for him to handle.”
“Mama June Shannon Gives Gory Details About Tummy Tuck;” “Mama June Denies Wearing a Fat Suit on New Show;” and “Honey Boo Boo and Pumpkin Chat New WE-TV Series With Mama June” were among the nearly 3,600 articles found bookmarked on Goutfoot's computer.
“His obsession clearly took an unhealthy turn,” said Milquetoast. “I mean, we're all obsessed with Mama June and Honey Boo Boo to some extent. What really matters is how we manage our compulsions.”
Shannon— mother of 11-year-old Here Comes Honey Boo Boo star, Alana “Honey Boo Boo” Thompson — turned heads last summer after she went public with her remarkable battle with the bulge. She lost 150 pounds through diet, exercise and gastric-sleeve surgery, prompted by news that her nearly toothless ex-husband and convicted arsonist and thief, Sugar Bear Thompson, was getting remarried to someone he's only known for eight months.
A new TV “docu-dramedy” chronicling Shannon's “Revenge Diet,” titled “Mama June: From Not to Hot,” premiered last month on WE-TV.
“Everyone here agrees the show is absolutely fabulous,” said Milquetoast. “And if it ends as I expect it will — with a bombshell Sugar Bear wedding series finale — then the Internet will explode. That said, if Mr. Goutfoot expects to make it through the next few months without relapsing he will need the unwavering support of friends and family."